Signs You’re Getting Older

I’m only 31 so I know I’m still young, but sometimes you have those moments when you know you are getting older. Case in points:

1. A few moments ago I was reading my latest park district catalog thinking about taking a new class (currently taking “Adult Potter” and man, do I have a lot crap to pawn off on people), when I read a description for “Woodcarving.” Cool, I always wanted to whittle. After being seduced with words like “learn techniques to make carvings in wood from a 30 year veteran” (what can I say, I’m easy with little adjectives), I was ready to sign up. Then I noticed for ages 55 & older. I went on to be seduced by “Jewelry.” “From glass to ceramics learn how to make bracelets, necklaces, brooches and more!” Then once again noticed the bold for ages 55 & older.

2. I have too many gray hairs to count. Also, speaking of vanity-I went through my teen years and 20’s without wearing makeup on a daily basis. When I turned 31 I started putting on light makeup every weekday morning. Just a little tinted moisturizer, neutral shadow, bronzer, blush, and mascara. Why did I start wearing makeup daily you ask? I got tired of being telling me I looked tired! When you tell someone they look tired, you’re telling them they look like sh*t. We all know it. I make a conscious choice not tell people they look tired because I don’t want to hurt their feelings.

3. I don’t bounce back the way I used too after a few cocktails.

4. I can’t stand teenagers.

5. Music I once loved to listen to loud, is now, a bit too loud.

6. I just don’t care about petty crap anymore.

7. I just don’t really get embarrassed anymore.

8. I use eye cream and wrinkle-fighting eye cream.

9. I’m too tired to finish this list.

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